As Previously Promised: A Film Documenting Christmas in Korea

      So here's a short film thanks to the budding editor, Quentin Landry.  As far as I'm concerned, Quentin Tarantino better watch out!  There will of course be more films to come.

Go Ahead and Stare

      It seems that I do this far too often but I'm apologizing, yet again for the absence of a recent entry. I haven't been feeling the greatest for the past few days and this morning I awoke feeling like I'd been hit by a truck. The sinus pressure headache, the runny/stuffy nose, the terrible body aches throughout my ribs and spine, and of course a fever. There are a million and one hand-me-down home remedies for how to get better and at this point, I'd be willing to try them all.

      One of the more popular remedies is to soak in a hot tub and breathe in the humidity. Well I don't have a tub. But there are plenty of jimjilbangs here in Korea. A jimjilbang is a local bath house where you can go to soak in pools of various temperatures and sit in saunas. They are separated by gender and require that you be completely nude.

      So my logic earlier today was that if I'm going to go to my first jimjilbang, it might as well be the best. Spa Land (an incredibly large jimjilbang, perhaps the largest in the country) is located in Shinsegae, the world's largest department store, and through research, looks so nice that I probably shouldn't be let in. Although I felt terrible, I decided to take the 30 minute subway ride in hopes of finding relief in the utmost of style and comfort. Feeling extremely light-headed I barely made it there but couldn't wait for the relief. Now Spa Land doesn't have an English interpretation to its website (something I'd expect from such a popular and well known attraction), so my first move was to find the information desk.

      I successfully discovered the entrance and was amazed that a place so nice would only cost $12 for four hours! And then, just as I foreshadowed earlier, they didn't let me in. You see, there's a no tattoos policy. At this point, I felt like passing out. But what could I do? I just got on the subway and rode it all the way back home...money well spent.

      I knew of a very small, local jimjilbang just a few block away from my apartment but couldn't help but picture it as the dirtiest, sketchiest place of all. But desperate times call for desperate measures. I stopped in, paid my $4, and headed to the baths. Needless to say I drew the full attention of the 30 Korean men as I stumbled through the baths trying to figure out what everything was. There were maybe twenty shower heads and stools to sit on for your normal lather up, shave, and shower. Then there were five different pools ranging in temperature from "a little to cold" to "a lot too hot."  There was one sauna that was absolutely too hot and humid and they even had heated rooms to sleep in.  Most jimjilbangs are open 24 hours a day and Koreans take advantage of this.  It is customary to sleep on the floor here in Korea, so why not grab your blankets and spend the night lying around on a heated floor?  Perhaps sweating your fever out.  The highlight of my time spent in the baths was getting to listen to a Korean pawpaw moan what sounded to be Gregorian chants for an hour.

      Was it awkward? Yep. Was it dirty? Yep. Did it help? Momentarily. Was it worth being stared at for 2 hours for only $4? Ehh, why not?! Will I go back? Probably so.

For My Sake, I Hope This is a Good Idea

      I'd be willing to say that I've had some pretty good ideas in my life. Unfortunately I've also had some pretty terrible ideas in my life. Shall we view a short list?

The Good – chose some damn good life-long friends
(especially those who have consistently been there for me through this endeavor)

The Bad – dyed my hair "smurf" blue once

The Good – attended college

The Bad – chose a worthless major

The Good – fell in love

The Bad – acted like an ass and am now alone

The Good – hmmm...

The Bad – jumped off of way too many roofs into pools and bayous

The Good – ehh...

The Bad – done a few too many things that have resulted in broken bones and/or stitches

The Good – ???

The Bad – pretty much every single decision I've made because I'm hard-headed and don't listen

The Good – *seriously scratching my head*

The Ba...you know what, that's enough of that.

      It's currently up-in-the-air as to which category my latest idea will be classified under. I've decided to take advantage of living in Asia and become a student of the martial arts. Sounds cool, right? My logic is that a true black-belt such as Master Kim (who trains one of the UFC's fighters, Dong Hyun Kim) doesn't offer to teach you Muay Thai and K-1 kickboxing everyday so you may as well take advantage of it. Also, nine year old Ryan who watched Bloodsport every chance he got would be thoroughly upset if he found out I didn't jump on this chance. So the plan is to take a break from exercising with weights and hopefully use this as a means to achieve my fitness goals. Maybe I'll be in incredible shape after a few grueling months of training. Maybe I am secretly super talented and I'll compete as a Western phenom.

      More likely my body will end up black and blue. I'll be completely embarrassed, battered, and broken. I'll probably get my head kicked clean off...but at least I can say I tried. Breaking down my comfort zone has clearly become the theme of my time here.

Take 1 - Lights...Camera...Action!

      I'd like to flashback to when Brandon and Quentin were here to visit me a few weeks ago if I may. We set out with the intention of creating a short indie film (for lack of a better description) as a form of video art to remember our adventures in South Korea. Editing and producing the footage depends on certain computer software which we do not yet have, but until then I thought I'd start sharing a clip or two with the world. I find myself watching the many videos that were taken when I need a laugh.

I'm Much Too Old to Act this Damn Young

      It's been a few days since my last update but I'll use the "I've been so busy at working towards my New Year's resolution" excuse. I have been at the gym constantly and successfully made changes to my diet. How are you doing with your resolutions? Anyone hoping to get into better shape? Well here's what I use for motivation. If these people are strong enough to achieve such wonderful change, then so are you! No excuses for 2013.

      I know what you're saying though..."Ryan! You're skinny and don't have to lose weight to get in shape and blah, blah, blah." I told you that I'm making big changes as well. I eat two or three salads a day. Let me say that again – I EAT TWO OR THREE SALADS A DAY! If you know me at all, your jaw is on the floor right now. So yes, I'm willing to tackle even the toughest of obstacles.

      As for lessons learned, I was at the gym a few nights ago doing a hellacious leg workout when one of the male trainers and his workout partner start their leg routine as well. There's a female trainer who always flirts with me and a Korean kid that I've befriended there too. Well the male trainer and his friend get on the leg press machine and rack it up with 120 kilos (264 lbs). They hit it a few times and decide it's time to step up the intensity. The female trainer sits on top the rack for added weight as each guy attempts a few squats. After the two guys, she looks at me and tells me to come over and try. Clearly, an hour into my workout, my legs are exhausted and using my common sense, I politely decline. Wait, no, that didn't happen. Fueled by testosterone and four Koreans staring at me, of course I take a seat ready to squat until my quads bleed. The female trainer says to try five reps so I obviously want to go for eight or nine. As my wobbly legs hit the ninth rep, she says to try for number ten which mean I now need to go for fifteen. The good news is I got it. The bad news is it's five days later and my legs still feel like jello.

      What is it about my brain that still thinks I'm 18 or 21? I'm only months away from 30 but I sure don't act like it. And none of this was really to impress the girl. I had to prove that I was more masculine than the three guys watching this old white guy. Basically I did it for America! It's times like that when I could use a girlfriend to slap some sense into me. I feel like that's one way to straighten me up. I know that having any of my guy friends there wouldn't have helped. Being cut from the same cloth, they'd have done it as well.

Our Final Outing

      As our time wound down, Brandon, Quentin, and I set out one more time before their departure.  We visited the Buddhist village that houses Samgwangsa Temple.  We were treated to the unexpected surprise of a fresh, nightly snowfall although we didn't get to actually experience it in the act.  The village is massive and boasts that it can house 10,000 monks.

 

     During Brandon and Quentin's stay in Korea, I had an absolutely wonderful time.  We probably could have stayed in my apartment and I would have loved it just as much.  I genuinely hope that they enjoyed these experiences as much as I did and know how much it meant to me that they literally traveled across the world to see me.  That speaks volumes as to what true friendship is.  I'd like to think that they know I'd do the same for them.  It's having people like this in my life that lets me know I'm truly blessed.

Photo-Randomness!

We found a Smoothie King at the world's largest mall in

honor of Mrs. Steph, Mr. Barry, Barret, Blake, and Bri.

Quentin picking out his lunch.

     And for more photographs of our South Korean odyssey (as well as his other travels), you should check out Brandon's website!

Haedong Yonggungsa - The Water Temple

      The one-of-a-kind Buddhist temple, Haedong Yonggungsa, is unique in the fact that it was built along the coastline instead of high in the mountains which was the more common practice.  Legend has it that while a monk was meditating on this site, the only female Buddha revealed herself to him while riding a sea dragon through the waves.  The temple was built on this very site to honor her.

      And since this is my first post of the new year, best wishes with your resolutions.  I'm on day two of my fitness quest.  Better than I was at 25?  Better than 20?  Why not be in the best shape of my life for my 30th year?!

An Open Letter to the New Year

Dear 2013,

      As we, humanity, approach your commencement, many will reflect on the previous year and how we've lived our lives. We'll make resolutions and are determined to live better as soon as you begin. This process seems to involve a sense of refocusing on things that are important to us so that when we come to your end, we'll look even more favorably on you than previous years. That's a lot of pressure and for that, I'm sorry. It's just that we feel you hovering out there in our consciousness, but know little about you. We're certainly aware that your debut is always in style, on the same night of the year, and that the other 364 nights serve as your denouement. After all is said and done on this night though, the majority are left unsatisfied and let down. And sadly enough, the rest of your days won't be any better for you. Get ready for the onslaught of resolutions and the heavy burden of blame when our diets, planned personality changes, and new found ambitions go south. That's not your fault though. We humans are clingy - we need life rafts, whether real or imagined – and if (when) we go down, we take you with us. The good news is that humanity has a short attention span - I'm sure most can't remember the promises of last year – so you'll receive forgiveness (unfortunately by eventually being forgotten).
      So rather than blaming you 2013, I hope that humanity tries taking our desires and ambitions seriously, whether our resolutions are as lofty as world peace or as humble as smiling more on a daily basis. As an unintended consequence of running away, I've been blessed enough to have a head start on finding the inspiration and emotional wherewithal to (hopefully) follow through on my hazy scheme for self-improvement. Here's to finding optimism, forgiveness, love, and resolve during your reign 2013.

Ryan