To Eat Or Not To Eat

There are an infinite number of reasons to travel.  To relax in a stress-free atmosphere, to experience a different culture, to discover something new, to retrace history, or – my personal favorite – to experience unfamiliar and exciting cuisine.  My philosophy when traveling has been, and always will be, to eat any and everything that is not at your disposal back where you reside.  My apologizes, but I don't want to eat McDonald's in Paris, Subway sandwiches in Barcelona, or Chili's in Tokyo.  Nor do I want something basic and generic.  Don't offer me a hamburger or a slice of pizza.  Please entice me.  Or challenge me.  Or disgust me.  Either way, I'll be intrigued to try whatever it is that's been prepared.

The food scene in New Orleans seems to be thriving because of this very concept.  While steeped in traditional ingredients, there is a seemingly fresh desire to be creative.  To fuse new flavors or textures in an uncommon way.  It's even acceptable to cross over the boundaries which define genres.  I can see how one's palette could get spoiled in a gastronomic Mecca such as New Orleans.

Still, I'll continue to seek all that Bangkok has to offer.  There seemed no better place to start than the incredibly large farmer's market, Klong Toey.  If ever there were a place to experience all that the locals could propose, this would be it.

Able to walk amongst thousands of Thais, I witnessed farmers trucking in their recently harvested crops, fishermen hauling in the morning's catch, and merchants hacking, cleaning, preparing, and cooking the wildest of creations.  The market is so large that it feels like a town.  Row after row after row mimic the crowded streets of Bangkok; there are narrow lanes and endless human traffic.  And like Bangkok itself, this "town" isn't clean.  Picture a post-apocalyptic refuge camp.  The walkways are filthy and flooded with mud, water, feathers, scales, blood, and the occasional fish or octopus that's managed to escape from its bucket.  This entire compound exists beneath a canopy of rusty sheet metal and giant umbrellas which cast their colors upon the market and its vendors, patrons, and goods.  I understand the concept of why one would construct this quasi-roof but what they've unintentionally done is create a furnace.  With no moving air, the stifling heat and humidity incubate in this inferno.  It's unbearable.

But I went there for food, and food I would get.  Thailand's produce selection is phenomenal.  There is no end to the peak growing season in this tropical climate.  The pineapples...oh, the pineapples!  Here, they are skinned and sliced freshly upon being harvested; I can assure you that you haven't experienced a pineapple such as these.  The taste is truly unrivaled.  And the carrots are enormous!  You'd be hard-pressed to find one less than 12 inches and under a half pound.  The selections of leafy greens are vast as well.  Now granted, most of these are what Westerners would consider grasses – and the Thais pick them as such – but they're wildly popular in soups.  Produce wasn't why I was there however.  I made sure to seek out the oddest things to eat and did just that.  There were all types of fish, crustaceans, sea cucumbers, and mussels – both alive or freshly cleaned – available (which was impressive given that we're not really near the coast).  Numerous chickens and ducks caged next to the open flames that will eventually roast them would drive any animal rights activist to tears.  And – as if I were back home – there were frogs, turtles, hog's head and feet, chicken hearts and gizzards, and turkey necks.  The stars of this adventure however were the insects.  Crickets, worms, grubs, water beetles, and grasshoppers were all available... and raw.  For a moment, I imagined being in a old fishing bait shop.

Foreshadowing From Above

Before

After

I stared at a piece of styrofoam placed atop a mound of yellow grubs and attempted to read what was written on it.  There were two numbers and some Thai words.  Was this a certain amount of grubs for a particular price?  Unsure, I stood there awkwardly staring and pondering if I was about to spend 3.50 Baht for 20 grams of grubs or 20 Baht for 3.50 grams. Surely this couldn't be kilos, right?  During this moment of lengthy confusion, the woman selling the insects finally grabbed a black cricket and presented it to me.  I attempted to offer her some pocket change as compensation but she refused.  Our charades back and forth drew a crowd around her and me – the only farang at the entire market – to see whether or not I'd eat this raw cricket.  In one fell swoop, I munched it down.  Not bad, surprisingly so.  Neither were the brown crickets, nor the grasshoppers.  This insect buffet took a turn for the less-desirable with the consumption of the yellow grubs.  These squishy and oddly cold grubs burst their liquid-filled abdomen across my tongue with the first bite.  Chewing and swallowing became a much more labored task.  But I did it; I ate one of every bug in front of me.  And upon finishing, I was met with applause from the gathered crowd.

My mission for this outing was now accomplished, but there are still additional delicacies I'd like to sample.  Hopefully the scorpions, snakes, birds, and lizards will be next.

Bangkok: A Photo Essay

     The following photographs document a day spent lost in Bangkok.  This is a mere sample of the landscape, traditions, means of transportation, history, the people, and the cuisine it has to offer.

Traveling down the Chao Phraya River

The night skyline

A raw carrot, broccoli, and walnut salad

A shrine for good luck on a rooftop

The Chao Phraya River

The Reclining Buddha - 45 ft. tall...

...and 150 ft. long

Wat Pho

In Good Company

Fortune is an odd universal concept to me.  Good fortune especially; what a foreign idea.  Typically, I feel like a walking example of Murphy's Law.  But during this brief residence in Bangkok I have yet to get lost, pick-pocketed, mugged by a monkey, get in a bar fight, lose a finger, or become the damsel in distress of Taken 4.  Actually, it's been quite the opposite.  I suppose I could argue that I've been blessed.

One of these blessings have been the strangers I've met.  I really couldn't have been more lucky with meeting the most sincere, intelligent, and good-natured people.  This all began one night at the Suda Palace Hotel.  While downstairs in the lobby, a conversation was struck between a few Thai teachers and myself, and I took a seat on the bench for the piano near our gathering.  Naturally the question of "Do you play?" arose followed by my response of "Only a little." with the hope of the conversation moving along.  It didn't.  Somehow I became the evening entertainment for the entire lobby; its staff and its guests.

During my set list, down wandered Amanda – one of many farang (foreigners) – looking for the just the slightest signal of Wi-Fi.  You'd think that a developing country in Asia wouldn't have any issue with the internet.  Wrong.  It's spotty at best.  Looking for some solitude to write, little did Amanda know that she was walking into a piano-fueled cacophony.  Fortunately for her, I didn't entertain the Thai teachers much longer so the peace and quiet she was searching for became available.  A conversation was struck based on mutual interests – writing, art, music – and a kindred spirit was found.  A friend made.

Left to Right - Katy, Amanda, Kelly

My new friendship with Amanda offered the opportunity to meet the others that would be sent to the town of Khon Kaen with her.  Kelly, Rebecca, and Katy completed this Fantastic Four.  All of whom are strong, independent, talented, intelligent, self-identifying feminists.  They each offered varying personality traits however.  Optimism, sarcasm, patience, intuition.  This connection came to fruition after a mishap involving my luggage being accidental stolen.  Once I tracked it down, I landed at the same hostel as the girls.  Over the span of a few days, conversations were had that offered intrigue, challenges, insight, and enlightenment.  Opportunities that I sincerely appreciated.  How often does one truly get a chance to establish genuine relationships, especially in what could be considered a dire or isolated scenario?

Kelly and Rebecca

As our time together ended and we went our separate ways, but not before discussing America's Northern states versus its Southern states, vegetarianism, gender roles, animal rights, contemporary music and art, and humanity.  I can only hope that I've offered them a fraction of what they given me.  Perhaps our paths will cross again in Bangkok, Khon Kaen, Sakon Nakhon, or somewhere in between.  Thanks always; it is much appreciated.

Katy, Thai Guy, Kelly, Amanda

An Observation Of...

It seems that I've stumbled upon the habit of drawing comparisons of Bangkok to Busan and I'm not quite sure how I feel about that yet.  On one hand, I dislike the feeling of labeling people, customs, places, actions, etc. Could that set an unfair precedent from one variable to another?  Conversely, I suppose it's only natural.  Could an isolated experiences exist if it weren't for others to relate them to?  How would I know which is the best steak I've ever eaten if it weren't for the lackluster ones?  Or which location on the human body is the most painful spot to be tattooed?  Or who are the greatest friend if it weren't for the assholes?

I'll interrupt myself here with what I feel would be a common rebuttal; "Those examples are subjective.  My tastes are different from yours.  My pain may vary from someone else's.  But when comparing Bangkok to Busan, these are two things that can be quantified."  Absolutely correct.  However, in both cases, these are merely my observations to the world around me.  I'm not commenting on the population density, the year that democracy was established, or the square mileage which each country covers.  I wander in observation of how the world and I interact; this perspective is no one's but my own.

So without further adieu, some thoughts...

-One of the more interesting things to me is the race of the population of Bangkok.  There are native Thais (darker skin, shorter in stature, and distinctly harsh features) and there are Chinese Thais (pale skin, taller stature, and smooth, subtle features).  There's a slight divide between these groups based on the perceptions of social status and class, with the pale-skinned Thais thinking that they're of a higher status.  This is much different than Busan whose population is over 90% pure Korean decent.  It's a much more racially homogenized city.

-Both cities aren't the cleanest; there are just too many people taking up too much space.  Without any open-air landfills to take the massive amounts of garbage produced by the large populations, it get highly stacked on every street corner.  With this amount of rank trash out in the open, one can naturally expect roaches and rats.  Now here's where the cities differ – Bangkok is over-run with mangy, wild dogs and Busan is over-populated with feral cats.

-Traffic is worse in Bangkok.  Drivers are worse in Bangkok.  The rules of the road do not exist in Bangkok.  In essence, if your mode of transportation can fit in a space, you go there.  If your vehicle is too large to fit in said space, you force yourself there anyways.

-While residential spaces in both cities contain the customary Asian-style open bathroom (tiled floor and walls, a drain in the center of the floor, a shower head mounted on the wall), Thailand plumbing leaves a lot to be desired.  Though South Korean toilets can handle toilet paper being flushed, Thai piping can not.  Cue the "Bum Gun".  This is a high-pressured spray nozzle mounted next to every toilet which is used to wash exactly what you think it washes.  You then dry yourself with toilet paper (which is more on par with the single-ply tissue Stateside) and dispose of it in the garbage can.

 -Lastly, Thailand has adopted the British rules of driving.  The steering wheel is on the opposite side of the vehicle from South Korea and America.  Also, the opposing lanes in the road are used when traveling.  Be careful!  Americans will look to their left first but the cars will be speeding at you from the right!

Dear Bangkok,

     Bangkok, I don't understand you. The sun relentlessley beats down upon you but within minutes, the sky opens to pouring rain only to return to its prior state just as rapidly. You embrace materialism at the utmost of luxary even when the most decrepid and crumbling existences are within sight. Today, I even saw a roach eating a roach. Every imaginable mode of transportation – and I mean everything spanning automobiles, scooters donning two or even three people, and bicycles to old lady-propelled all-inclusive cooking stations, tuk-tuks, and open-topped flatbed work trucks loaded with so many people one has to wonder how the stationary vehicle ever initially broke inertia – floods the streets like salmon in an Alaskan stream during the spawn. And it never slacks, there is no down time, nor are there rules. Bangkok defies the common logic that works in other cities where taking a taxi is a quick, efficient way to get directly to one's destination. No, not here. That pathetic little salmon stands no chance of swimming up, down, left, or right in hopes of getting to any destination in a timely fashion. Save yourself the stress and just take the BTS Sky Train; a monorail that runs on an elevated track through the city. In typical Thai fashion, it doesn't go near the major tourist attractions though. Be prepared to walk.

     I'm not done yet. Your written language. What? How? I'd like to optimistically think that I'll grasp some aspect of it in the future, but I probably won't. During my time in Korea, I came to the realization that stylizing the alphabet makes it incredibly difficult to learn. We take it for granted because it's something we're so familiar with but there are an infinite number of fonts, even some with or sans serif. When you're forced to diligently study each mark in hopes of learning the skill that is basic communication, you'll understand what I mean.

     Your currency. To put this in perspective, $1 roughly equals 34 Thai Baht. Conversely, 1 Thai Baht is $0.028. That's essentially nothing. Pointless, right? Well confusingly enough, there exists the Satang. There are 100 Satang in 1 Baht. They actually mint 25 Satang coins. During my short time here I haven't studied the status of the economy but I can offer a suggestion that'll help no matter what it is. Stop creating currency that is valued at less than the metal it is made from! That doesn't even take into consideration the workers' salary or the cost of powering the machinery either.

     Finally, your men – specifically lady boys (do NOT perform a Google search for this at work!). I haven't been here nearly long enough to delve into this counter-culture yet, but more on this to come in due time.

Post-Interlude

     I'll attempt to explain this the best I can...my life is plagued by self-questioning. "Why", "What", and "When" are relentless; my head continuously attempts to process sentences beginning with these words. Easy enough you say...

     False. Not for me, though I wouldn't expect most to understand. I can't get out of my own way sometimes. I have knee-jerk reactions to the emotions that I get tangled in. I make rash decisions. I wear my heart on my sleeve. To those who know me, it's no secret as to what plagues me.

     So here I sit as a consequence to one of these absurd decisions made in utter disregard, in a claustrophobia-inducing, concrete-walled hotel room in central Bangkok, Thailand. Hot, dingy, humid, stagnant, crowded, seedy Thailand. And no, not on a vacation either. My bags fully packed; in the midst of moving here. Family, friends, and a well-paying job left behind. Oops. Seems like insane decision, no? At the moment, I'd struggle to disagree.

      Here's where you'll ask "Why??". Please don't add to my already-overwhelming list of questions. Believe me, I've watched the pages fall from the wall as the days, months, years pass in anticipation of an epiphany and still...nothing. If forced to respond, I'll hastily say "Why not?", fully aware that this is nothing more than the cheapest rationalization available.

     I've been here before though...and likely will be again. While it may make more sense to claim this is a new vinyl entirely, it honestly feels comfortably more like I've yet to completely listen to the previous album. So why not revisit this familiar and seemingly inevitable theme?

     I'll remain here, on Side B, while these songs are still stimulating. Perhaps in the near future, I'll stumble upon the completely new sound that'll be the next album.

LHB

So I reflect on all of the recent artwork I've created and can only think but one thing...why can't I have you?